Running as Root

Part of this weekend was spent catching up on the movie queue. All movies but one were a disappointment.

Sweeny Todd

I'm not a big fan of musicals and I'm thinking I may not be much of a Tim Burton fan, at least not any more. I'm finding his quirky visual style tiresome lately. Maybe it's just overexposure. I realize this crapfest is based on a hit Broadway musical, but it blows in spite of (or maybe because of) this. I think the average stretch in the movie without a song is roughly 3 minutes. To make it worse, the songs aren't at all memorable. The story is predictable and the characters uninteresting. Yawn.

Underdog

I never expect much from what I consider to be kid movies and I'm typically not disappointed. Underdog is peppered with jokes that fall flat to the adult crowd. I'm guessing kids find this shit funny, but I really have no idea. Jason Lee voices Underdog and I can't help but hear Earl Hickey. Patrick Warburton reprises his role as Putty, Kronk, or Agent Tee. Take your pick: it's the same voice every time.

Margo at the Wedding

A pointless romp about quirky characters I really couldn't give a shit about. Nicole Kidman and Jack Black in the same movie? Pinch me. At least you get a flash of Jennifer Jason Leigh's boobies. Save yourself the agony of watching the movie and just find them on the internet.

Across the Universe

Is there anything better than hearing second rate actors/singers deliver butchered renditions of your favorite Beatles' songs amidst a plot about the draft, musicians seeking fame, and a love story between two young American Idol rejects? Yay. The movie reminded me just how many Beatles songs I actually like when they're not being twisted into soulless shadows of themselves by failed karaoke singers.

Dan in Real Life

Dan in Real Life was the only good movie of the bunch. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Steve Carell continues to impress me by not being pigeon holed into roles similar to his insanely good character from The Office. There's something really honest feeling about his delivery and mannerisms in this movie. It was quite satisfying and I recommend it highly. He plays an advice columnist that is a widower and father of three daughters. The movie is centered around a yearly family reunion. I won't spoil your enjoyment with any more information than that.

X-Men: The Last Stand - 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

I'm not a reader of the many, many comic books for X-Men so my opinion is not affected by the movies possibly not living up to the original material. That being said, my minor problem with all of the movies is the feeling that there is too much back history to squeeze into a 1 1/2 to 2 hour movie. It leaves me feeling like I'm the only one not laughing at many of the inside jokes.

As always with the X-Men movies I feel that Ian McKellen completely eclipses the other actors and their characters. My thoughts while watching any of them vacillate between "where's Magneto" and marvelling at how much Wolverine gets his ass kicked.

The bigger disappointment with this movie is the DVD version. The deleted scenes and alternate endings are just plain weak. The 10 or so deleted scenes amount to things like Beast emitting a growl when meeting Wolverine or of two versions of Pyro telling Magneto they've found Mystique. One of the versions has Magneto with a beard. Well whoopety-fucking-doo. That aside, I like the entire series and it's one of the better movie trilogies around, though there is still plenty of room for the greatest of all time to emerge someday…

Junebug - 4 out of 5 stars

This movie is pretty much a character study of weird people in a North Carolina family and the outsider that married into it. That's exactly what I like about it. It's probably not for everyone. It moves pretty slowly at times, some of the shots are held too long (but again, I think that's some of its charm), and it doesn't go for the cheap joke by making fun of its characters.

Like everyone, my wife and I have some pretty odd family members. It was enjoyable, for me at least, to savor the awkward silences, baffling directionless anger, and downright "what the fuck are you thinking" moments between the characters. There are also some priceless, very subtle moments (very well acted, too) involving the presence of religion in some of the characters' lives. The uncomfortable reaction of the main character is one I've experience many, many times. Thanks to my recent acquisition of a Netflix account I'm getting to see more of these movies that I consider sleeper hits.

I highly recommend this movie for people that like that indie film feel, don't need a laugh track or the joke pointed out for them, and like characters over plot. It makes a good rental, but if you wind up not liking it I won't be surprised. Again, it may not be for everyone. I also can't recommend Netflix highly enough. If you feel like adding me as a friend on there let me know and I'll let you know the account name (it's my gmail address).

The Aristocrats - 3 out of 5 stars

This is a documentary by Paul Provenza and Penn Jillette. The subject matter centers around a joke that has a beginning and an end but no real middle. The middle of the joke is improvised by the teller and the goal is to make it the most shocking and offensive joke you possibly can. I'm a huge fan of Penn Jillette's radio show as I've mentioned before, so I typically enjoy anything with which he's involved. I like this movie a decent amount but it falls just short of greatness.

The main drawback of the movie is twofold. The first is that many of the comedians retelling the joke approached it in pretty much the same way. After hearing 10 or so variations of "piss and shit everywhere" along with combinations of incestuous pedophilic anal sex you long for something more. The second problem is that it has gotten much more difficult to shock people. As such, I didn't find most of the material shocking or disgusting (although my wife certainly did).

I still enjoyed the movie as a documentary. Hearing stories from entertainment industry insiders was fairly interesting. In addition, the DVD extras (especially the "other jokes" section) were very entertaining. It's always fascinating to me to hear analysis of why something is funny. I'd definitely recommend renting it, though it's not for the faint of heart.

North Country - 2 out of 5 stars

This movie stars Charlize Theron (who was smoking hot in Monster) as a single mother who takes a job in a coal mine. It's inspired by the true story of a group of female miners that brought sexual harassment charges against the mine in which they worked. During the course of their employment, the female workers are constantly harassed and menaced by their male counterparts. Theron's character makes several attempts to address the situation only to be knocked back down by both her male and female co-workers.

I didn't find the movie particularly entertaining. Sure it depicts how cruel and overbearing men can be in situations lacking true authority figures. It shows how inherently misogynistic most males are. Fantastic. I already knew that. My cub scout troop and I used to beat the smaller scouts with pillow cases full of chili cans, crucify hobos, and incinerate female carnies when the scout master wasn't looking. That doesn't make us bad people. I digress. Watching two hours sexual harassment followed by typical corporate strong arm courtroom tactics followed by shocking and awful revelations from the main character's past just don't make for entertainment.

Now if you want to see a good, entertaining movie with some coal mining in it rent Zoolander.

I think I got the black lung, pop. — Derek Zoolander

Walk the Line - 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

One of the hazards of seeing most movies on video is that when a good movie comes along, it has a lot to live up to. Everyone I know saw this movie before me and raved about how good it is. I really like Johnny Cash because of his music and his attitude. Reese Witherspoon does a great job in the movie, but ultimately the show is stolen by a very impressive performance by Joaquin Phoenix. In the movie, he sings his own vocals (as did Witherspoon) and does an amazing job of sounding a lot like Johnny Cash.

The movie gives a high level view of Cash's life from early childhood up to the recording of At Folsom Prison, covering his tumultuous relationships with his first wife, his second wife-to-be, his father, alcohol, and drugs. There are a number of great moments in the film. The scene where Cash first plays his song Folsom Prison Blues for a record producer sent shivers down my spine.

Ultimately the movie gets a "very good" rating, rather than great, from me for a few reasons. One is that it was too hyped for me by the people I know that saw it before me. The other reason is that Cash lived far too rich of a life for a movie to do it justice. And lastly I find the scar from Phoenix's microform cleft distracting, especially when he's playing a real figure that has no such scar. Call me shallow. Phoenix still does a great acting job and deserves any and all awards he may get.

Despite my idiotic reasons for not giving this movie a higher rating, I do highly recommend it. It is a very enjoyable movie to watch. And you've got to love the soundtrack.

Flight Plan - 2.5 out of 5 stars

Jodie Foster plays a woman, Kyle, who is flying back from Berlin with her daughter and the body of her dead husband. They're flying back on a massive plane (two stories, a full bar, recliners in first class, etc) that Foster's character helped design. Early in the flight, Kyle wakes up to find her daughter missing. Unfortunately no one on the plane seems to remember her daughter getting on the plane, Kyle can't find the boarding pass to prove her daughter is on the plane, and the gate back at the terminal denies there being any record of her daughter as a passenger. Foster then goes into full on "I'm NOT crazy" mode.

There are a couple of twists in the plot (which I don't want to give away) and the movie is fairly watchable and even entertaining overall. There really aren't any huge special effects and very little in the way of fancy directing. It reminds me a lot of another Foster movie, Panic Room. They're both very low impact movies that make you say, "meh." Rent it if you want a moderately entertaining PG-13 movie you can watch with your parents.

Lord of War - 3 out of 5 stars

Nicolas Cage stars in this movie as a freelance illegal arms dealer operating through the 1980s and 1990s. The story centers around Cage selling arms to any and every side of the messier conflicts in that time period while trying to avoid capture by Interpol agent Ethan Hawke. Despite business being good, Cage's character's life is, understandably, falling apart in nearly every way.

While I can see some of the scenes being uncomfortable for sensitive viewers, I thought the movie was fairly good overall. Cage, as is often the case, delivers a powerful performance and makes even the most morally questionable characters appealing through his charismatic delivery. Despite the potentially heavy subject matter there are still quite a few funny moments, though the movie definitely tries to end on a darker note. Although none of the other actors stood out much in comparison I think Cage easily carries the film from the acting standpoint.

I give this movie a strong recommendation and I don't think you can go far wrong by renting it. On a side note, if you're looking for a lighter, funnier movie about arms dealers, consider the dated, pseudo-classic Deal of the Century.

Club Dread - 1 out of 5 stars

This movie is pretty much unwatchable. It's meant as a parody of crappy, camp based horror movies like Friday the 13th. Nearly all of the jokes fall flat. The one part that I found funny was the character Coconut Pete the Jimmy Buffet copy, played by Bill Paxton, singing Pina Coladaberg. It's his song that came out 7 years before Margaritaville. It was amusing, but not worth the rental. This one's a skipper.

Into the Blue - 2 out of 5 stars

This movie is like Baywatch meets The Deep, starring a blonde Keanu Reeves (aka Paul Walker). While it's easy to watch, there are no real surprises beyond typical movie cliche twists. Paul Walker plays a dive bum who dreams of finding sunken treasure with his girlfriend Jessica Alba. I don't think it's much of a spoiler to say that he, of course, finds it. However, it's not that easy *gasp*. The rest of the movie is him and his group getting into and out of trouble as they try to uncover and lay claim to what they suspect is a massive fortune. Like I said, it's not hard to watch but not particularly rewarding. If they're out of everything good, or that you suspect might be good, at the video store you can stand to rent it.